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She fell first, but he fell harder

“Who fell first?” a question as old as time but remains relevant enough to be inquired by almost, if not every modern couple out there. As humans, we are born insecure, constantly worrying about not being loved enough by our fellow people.

The interviewed couple would like to stay anonymous, but we do not take responsibility if you ever found out who they are based on their lovely love story.

“Who fell first?” a question as old as time but remains relevant enough to be inquired by almost, if not every modern couple out there. As humans, we are born insecure, constantly worrying about not being loved enough by our fellow people. At the same time, we are easily consumed by our ego, which prevents us from admitting that we could give in within a nano-second of catching sight of someone attractive. Thus, simple as it is, the question of “Who fell first” lays bare humans’ paradoxical disposition and provides not one but several alternate scenarios into how relationships could be heading.

For the couple that we got to talk to today, the answer went beyond just a genuine “Her” or “Him.”

Our couple had a rough start. If you happen to know both of them before they fall in love, you would never imagine them together. He is a traditionalist, who likes tea, Sino-Vietnamese, and the likes. She, on the other hand, is a far cry, who adores adventures, dyed hair, and singing (?) They are supposed not to have their paths crossed until.. they did.

It was a work trip to Vinh Phuc for the final round of a contest, in which he was one of the speakers. What was originally a business trip brought the two together for the first time, although not in the best way possible. In fact, he reminded her of the nice guy stereotype, one who acts like he cares but goes on to break your heart. Funny enough, he was also forming an impression on the newly-met friend, who sang “The Crush Song” in the exhibition session and made him realize he was too old for that.

It was not clear at which moment the two grew fond of each other, but up till now, they still found themselves fighting over who fell in love first.

Her:  Neither of us admits to liking the other first. But it's obviously him.

Him: I don’t agree! It should be her.

With no easy answers available, we decided to come up with three interesting hypotheses.

Scenario one: She fell first

This is by far the most intuitive scenario considering the fact that our girl was the one who went on to confess her feelings first and score herself a boyfriend. Most importantly, she did all of that while handling her mental issues:

I was not in a good place mentally and was still trying to figure out myself.

As the Alpha Female as (we think) she is, our friend managed to come clean with her feelings and poured her heart out during the time when most people would close off to avoid getting more hurt. Despite the untimely confession, she was glad to have “gone for it” expecting the worst instead of hesitating and ending up in regrets. Clearly, she had fallen for him earlier than she realized.

Scenario two: He fell first

Most people and all of the K-drama script writers would beg to differ with this storyline. A serious-looking guy falls first for a cheerful, innocent girl. Oh please!

But what if that was true? What if we tell you that on that very stage in Vinh Phuc, he was concealing his warming heart and admiration with the impression that he was too old for that. In fact, he was never the old one in their relationship.

In their first year together, he gradually turned into a full-time, love-struck photographer, keeping a total of 2,000 photos of their lovey-dovey moments. When they had to make it long distance with our girl heading for an exchange program, he was left… crying.

HE cried a lot. I only cried a little at the airport, but he cried before, during, and after I went. I was not one to get all emotional in a relationship, not even in a breakup, so crying over being in a long-distance relationship was something I did not expect to happen.

The chessiness did not stop, and so did the love. After becoming a couple, our guy has helped his girlfriend to overcome her unstable periods. The song he wrote for Valentine’s Day, the presents he bought for anniversaries, and the constant presence and patience became her life anchor, something she devastatingly needed in the darkest times. He was falling for her no less.

Scenario three: Both fell at the same time

Undoubtedly, the notion of love of first sight alone might strike many of us as far-fetching and surreal, let alone two people loving each other at first sight. But looking at their healthy romantic relationship, we were tempted to consider that possibility. After all, they are both outstanding individuals at VinUni, having taken part in multiple leading roles and community activities. Both share the confidence, determination, and kindness loved and recognized by their friends, classmates, and professors. Thus, when they saw each other for the first time, it was all but a match made in heaven.

And they proved it. Amidst all the doubt and duties, both learned to love and be in love. Their relationship showed that it's not how you start that's important, but how you progress. Even though our couple did not appear to be matching at first glance and their time together was not necessarily smooth sailing, they keep falling for each other harder as time goes by. This takes more than love, it’s love made patient, compassionate, and mutual.




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